Today was the last day (in Holland, at least) that Immortals was playing, and since the movie looked kinda good (the whole “from the team that brought you ‘300’” thing got me) I decided to go check it out. I was planning on cashing in on the daily matinee deal, but was not really expecting to have to fork over nearly $20 for popcorn and 2 pops. Seriously, guys. You’re starting to push your limits there.
Anyways.
I walked into Immortals with pretty low expectations, largely because I know it had been panned by critics and the trailer made it look like a slightly less impressive copy of 300. Even the title for the movie seemed like an attempt to draw the 300 crowd (the Immortals being the best thing the Persians had to field against the Spartans). I am happy to say that the movie, by far, exceeded my expectations.
Immortals is, put basically, the love child of Disney’s Hercules and 300. Now, before you start cursing such a grotesque mating, just hear me out. Immortals tells the tale of Theseus, which for those of us who did some cursory Greek Mythology in high school or college, may have either merited a lecture or barely any mention at all (I only know of him through a mention in Disney’s Hercules, which I don’t really consider to be factual), but many of the concepts present in the movie, both directly and thematically, ring familiar: you’ve got the Gods (strangely absent from 2004’s travesty called Troy), the Titans, and the Hero’s Journey motif. Although the trailer bills itself as an almost incessant action movie, there’s a lot more to it than that.
Immortals borrows on some of the more common plot devices in Greek Mythology, including the Oracles and their prophecies, the Gods taking human form to walk among us, and their relative restraint in meddling with human affairs. While the movie takes liberties with the nature of the relationship between the Gods and the Titans, there is, in many ways, much more to this movie than there ever was with 300. 300 is a movie I scrub through to watch the battle scenes. Immortals is a movie I’ll buy on iTunes the day it comes out and watch to watch the entire tale.
Yes, there are some parts of the movie that I could see coming a mile away (what’s that? The hero meets a virgin Oracle? I wonder what could possibly happen between those two), and there are parts of that movie that I found somewhat unnecessary (we get the evil king is evil. We don’t need the Temple of Dooom approach to torture to establish that), but these are minor details. For the most part, this movie is less about the extended action scenes a la 300 (although the “their numbers count for nothing!” rallying speech sounds awful familiar) or the massive, epic battles a la Lord of the Rings or Troy, and more about the journey of Theseus. The final scene in the movie, which is equal parts epilogue and trailer for what can only be a sequel, really ties things together; you see the great moments of the movie wrapped up in the stone carvings that we would recognize today, and see the stories like the battle with the minotaur in the labyrinth for what they really are: slightly dressed-up interpretations of what really happened.
I look forward to seeing Immortals release on iTunes, and I’m sad I didn’t see this one sooner. That said, there is nothing quite like seeing a movie essentially on your own (it was just me and my mom in the theater). Using my mildly informal rating system, I’ll give this one four stars (see below for a rough translation of what that means).
Stars in real terms:
One star = screw this. Don’t watch it, don’t rent it, and certainly don’t buy it.
Two stars = wait for the rental.
Three stars = wait for it to come out on DVD. This isn’t worth the $18 popcorn or the $8.25 ticket.
Four stars = go watch it in theaters, and then go get it on DVD when it comes out. Take a date to it and hope she likes it.
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